What!!! Mom’s don’t wear bathing suits!! Lol.
It was a big deal for me! I have rarely used bathing suits, any time I did I would cover up. I had my first child when I was 15 years old and 115 lbs, I gained 65 lbs!! So you can imagine how much my belly stretched!! Not just my belly though, everything stretched!
Society has been telling us for years that stretch marks are shameful, extra skin is not attractive, thigh gaps are unacceptable, and cellulite is disgusting. We grow up watching and reading about beauty standards that are unrealistic. I didn’t really care until I started listening to my own daughter talk about how ”fat” she was, or how she didn’t like wearing bathing suits because of her stretch marks. She was about 15 years old and 100 lbs, size 0 in pants!! I thought to myself, she’s crazy!! That’s when I realized she had been watching me all along, complaining about this or that, disliking my body parts, hair, scars or looks. Always highlighting my flaws.
I had to change my behavior and help her understand that her body was perfect the way it was. The hard part was trying to make her believe something I couldn’t believe about my own body. It took time to change the habit of criticizing my body and learning to love myself just the way I am. Slowly I saw how she became more confident and stopped covering herself up. She still complains from time to time about how she gained weight and she feels “fat”, I just keep reminding her that she isn’t. But I do it too, it’s a hard habit to change when you see so many fake bodies on social media and television. I’m guilty of comparing myself to people I know that have kids and no stretch marks or belly fat.
We have to teach our children that any body type is beautiful and unique! That being different doesn’t make you ugly or weird. That most bodies you see on social media are usually fake. These people we see have money, time, and people that help shape their bodies the way they want to. I know there are also many real people you may know that don’t have any surgical procedures done, but they go to the gym or are very restricted in their diets. Or maybe they just have great genes! Whatever the case is, every body is unique and beautiful! As moms we should be grateful for our stretch marks because they came from the biggest blessings. They remind us of the life we created inside our bellies.
So stop following people on social media that make you feel insecure about yourself. There are many body positive accounts to follow and these influencers are real people like you and me.
For the first time in forever, I took off my shorts and jumped in the pool. I was still a bit self-conscious, but I faced my fear. After that, I sunbathed and my son took a picture of me. Everything was looking good when I was standing up, but when I saw my picture sitting down I didn’t like what I saw. I thought of deleting the picture because my belly looked bloated, but then I reminded myself that it doesn’t matter! Flat belly, big belly, scarred belly, jiggly belly, WHO CARES!!!!! Our kids sure don’t!
I’ve come to learn that when you are happy, you don’t worry about your looks! So put on your bathing suit and enjoy the summer with the ones you love! Your kids don’t love you because of your looks, they love you because you are awesome! Buy that two piece bathing suit and flaunt your imperfections. What matters is that you are happy so your family can be happy with you!
SMILE. IT’S FREE.
*please disregard my playboy bunny tattoo, I didn’t know what I was doing! Lol. 😬
PSA: don’t get tattoos before you’re 30!